6/9/14, More courage

Hi Everyone,

I hope you had a good week last week. Mine was one of those roller coaster weeks of personal, business and family ‘stuff’. I knew by mid-week when my best day was the day I went to the dentist (and I’m phobic about the dentist) that it had not been my easiest week. But I got some good results for my efforts, and I’m grateful for that.

I’ve been really busy trying to finishing up some work, so I’ve been working hard, and making plans for the summer.

And I noticed something perhaps interesting last week. I don’t know why, but I tend to jam all my ‘difficult’ appointments into one week, on the theory that it gets them over with, and then when I am faced with a really challenging week of my own making, I wonder what I was thinking. Sometimes, if everything else is stressful or challenging, I decide that I just can’t deal with one more stress, so I cancel the appointments that scare me or worry me: like the dentist, which always scares me, and then I reschedule for another time. At other times, I just plow through it, and am usually glad I did, to get it done and behind me. But I noticed something this week that I hadn’t thought of before. I’ve had some challenging weeks, and lo and behold, last week was one of those weeks when I had scheduled not only the dentist, but a medical appointment that I had been putting off for months. Nothing too serious, but just one more stress I didn’t need. And for some reason, I thought oh what the hell, just do it, so I did. So I went to the dentist, took care of the medical appointment which was nothing and went fine. But what I realized is that when I am courageous with my life, which I have been lately, oddly it makes me brave about the other things I have to do. I actually talked to my dentist this week, like a normal human being, instead of feeling sick before I went, skulking into their office, and then cowering in the chair wanting to refuse to open my mouth, and then wanting to hug everyone in the elevator when I leave, because I survived. But some courage in my daily life creates the courage to face difficult things, or just the ones that scare me. And having handled the dentist easily, it then gave me the courage to do the medical appointment (not a big deal, but just one of those things we all worry about: my annual mammogram, which was fine. I’ve never had a problem with it, but always worry anyway, because I’m a natural born worrier!!). But I realized that courage breeds courage, and when we face one of our demons, we face the others more easily. And similarly, when we let ourself off the hook and allow ourselves to be chicken, suddenly we get chicken about other things. At least it works that way for me, although sometimes we need to give ourselves a break. I noticed the same thing years ago when I had a really harrowing delivery with my son Nick, and having survived that I decided to take a fear of flying class right after, like a month later, confronted my fear of flying, took the class, and have been flying easily ever since. We need to go easy on ourselves at times and not pile too much on. But when we do muster up some courage, it makes us brave for other things.

What do you do when you’re scared? It’s a recipe that works for me, but it’s not for everyone. When the sh– hits the fan, I try to remind myself that God loves me, even if others appear not to. And I find Joel Osteen’s books incredibly encouraging and uplifting, and they’re very practical and down to earth. I just re-read “It’s Your Time”, which really boosted my spirits and got me feeling better and empowered again.

And I love these words of Winnie the Pooh, by AA Milne, “There is something you must always remember. You are braver than you believe, stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think.” What could be better than that? So Onward!! Have a great week!!!

love, danielle


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4 Comments so far
  1. Tina June 11, 2014 9:47 am

    I dont hate the dentist, but the high noises (I have a somewhat sensitive hearing), but I try to deal with it. I remeber when I was having my left lower wisdom tooth “pulled out”… It took hours and hours and hours (or so it felt, infact, it did take at least 2 hours). It all started badly because they couldnt get the x-ray of the tooth as they wanted, before in the last try even I got anesthesia, and then they used quite some time, to try to pull it out, because they thought that they could…

    It all ended up in a sugery, so they spilt it up in 2 or 3 pieces, and I was sore for a few days, but not even that made me scared for denstists, and my dentist at the time also told me, that I was so brave.

    Personally, I think, if you are scared of something, then you have to try to jump out to it. I dont like hights, but I try to overcome it.

    Like for instanse, about 12 yers ago, when I was in Paris with school, I got friend to take the camera up when we were in the Effiel Tower because I thought that I wouldnt make it, but I did, so now she took a picture of me when I was up there. My littlebrother was in Paris a half year earlier then me, but because of the 11th september, it was almost impossible to get up there, so he missed that out when he was in Paris with his school.

  2. Valerie June 11, 2014 8:02 pm

    When I’m in an anxiety inducing situation, I say the Bible verse Philippians 4:6-7 over and over in my mind.

  3. IP June 12, 2014 7:22 pm

    I wish dentist would scare me as much as the thought of – hypothetically, – becoming homeless. Also, I’m always afraid that no one will remember my birthday.
    When I feel scared, I usually try to call my mom, whom I love very much, or watch Seinfeld episodes, the make me laugh, or go to sleep and hopefully forget about my fears.
    Oh, and another thing that really helps me is this saying I heard somewhere: “Do not believe everything you think.”

  4. Sara Smiles June 12, 2014 11:32 pm

    Dear Danielle, Thank you for being so open and real and for sharing the intimate details of your personal life. It’s fun to read about the woman behind the books and know you’re not so different than the rest of us. I appreciate your insights and willingness to share. I especially appreciated the blog “Betrayals.” Notes to self, as I embark on a new business venture with lots of new people to establish relationships of trust with.

    Blessings to you and your family. Thank you again for your example and openness. Et, viva la France. J’taime Paris.