I hope you’ve had a great week, and that some really nice things happened to you this week. We can all use that, to give us a boost, even something small, a nice moment, something that makes us smile, or some piece of really good news.
I’ve been somewhat pensive, and quiet, in the almost two weeks since the passing of my ex-husband Tom. It’s a sad event for those of us who knew and loved and admired him, but he had an extraordinary life, a truly great life, and I think he got to do everything he wanted to do, and more. He lived to be a great age, and had opportunities and experiences few people have. He once went to Antarctica for several months on one of his boats—-(I stayed home!!! I would pay money, serious money, NOT to be on a sailboat, dodging icebergs in the dead of winter. He loved it, I would have hated it, so I didn’t go. But what an amazing experience for him, and the photos he brought back were fabulous!!). For those of us left behind when someone we love passes on, we are left with memories, the loose ends to tie up in our minds, and some introspection about their impact on our lives. So I have been quiet and reflective.
I’ve seen some close friends for lunch, and really enjoyed their company. And I had dinner at the home of good friends a few days ago. The wife is Japanese, so there were a number of Japanese people there, which was interesting, and nice to meet them. One of the couples had brought their nephew to dinner. He looked to be somewhere in his late twenties, was a biologist, and was leaving soon for a 6 month research project in Finland, so it was interesting talking to him. And at some point in the conversation, despite his youth, he said something that really caught my attention. He said that “You’re not old until your dreams become regrets”. Wow!! That is a very deep, and very true thought. No matter how old we are, we still have dreams, we ALL have dreams, or we should. Things we’ve always wanted to do, haven’t gotten to yet, and hope to get to one day. Some of it may not be realistic: Winning Miss Universe or Miss America at 55 or 65 or 70 is not likely to happen, you may have missed the boat on that. Or climbing Mount Everest. That could be sketchy too. But going somewhere that is actually feasible, traveling somewhere, building something, learning a language—-taking classes of some kind, or even writing a book. There’s no limit to what we can do—there may be some limits, but in many cases, we can fulfill at least some of our dreams. Some people even find their soul mate late in life. And bitterness and regret is not unique to old age. Some people give up on their dreams early, and shouldn’t. One of my favorite role models is an 88 year old friend of mine in New York. She is still working as an interior designer, takes classes to learn something new, goes to a book club, the theater, and sees nearly every movie and reads every book that comes out. She is still learning things at 88. She is a knock out, and so much fun. She is a living example to me of how I want to be when I’m her age, full of life, and busy, and still growing and doing, and fully alive. And obviously, good health helps.
I try to keep track of what my goals are every few years, and what I want to do. I try to keep track of it so those dreams don’t slip away. It’s easy to put our dreams away, and get bogged down in the every day. And sometimes I achieve those goals better than others. But I thought that what that young man said was so true….that you’re not old until your dreams turn into regrets (about what you didn’t do). It was a good wake up call for me, and I wanted to share it with you.
What are YOUR dreams? What do you want to do, that you haven’t gotten around to yet? It’s good to think about it from time to time. I have a rock on my desk with a saying carved on it, “It’s Never too late”. And another one that says “Follow your dreams”. It’s not too late for you to meet the right person, to take a class you’ve always wanted to take, to learn a language, learn to cook, take a writing class, a dancing class, to get in shape, to make new friends. I think that’s how people do stay young, interested and interesting, by opening new doors and windows, learning new things, even small things, and hanging onto those dreams.
It was a good reminder hearing that, and maybe for you too. Take good care, and have some fun! We all need it, a good belly laugh from time to time, and even just a warm moment with a friend. Have a terrific week!!
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What an great post, Danielle. Your 88 year old friend inspires us all to live life to the fullest no matter what our age. Truly, it’s never too late to follow your dreams. Thanks for this reminder and how you continually show us through the stories you write there is much to love and experience in life. Along with much magic!
I am curious as to why the silence on your Facebook and your blog as to the tragedy is Orlando especially living part time in San Francisco with a large LGBT community.
We could have used some of your strength regarding Hope over this issue to help light up the darkness.
We all came together for the tragedy in Brussels.
Warm love to you and all you have done for goodness.
How lovely and a great reminder! I believe your soul chooses your transition – when the desire to be here is less than the desire to move on, the universe conspires all the components to manifest your next choice. I’ve heard it said that the “death” experience is like going to a different movie theatre to see the movie you want to see. Angels are always with us and it’s up to us to allow them in. I hope that knowing your friend is right beside you, should you wish him to be,will comfort you. And when you feel good – you’ll feel it for he can only show up when you allow love. Pure positive energy is what he knows now, Thanks for sharing you with us. You are so loved.
very encouraging remarks!
Interesting…..I am reading It Ain’t Over…..by Marlo Thomas. The book is a collection of stories about women all different ages who didn’t give up on their dreams. The book is extremely enjoyable, and it just ended up on my lap. I am enjoying it since I just turned 60 and feel like I am at a crossroad in my life.
Just read “Betrayal” Why so many sentences start with “And” after a while it becomes blah, blah, blah,. Now I know why I don’t like to read your novels. Seems like a noted author would use better English sentencing.
My mother started me on your book back in the 70’s even the movies. Now my daughter is a great fan. I was thinking my family has a story and thought you could write a book about it. In short version there is 7 of us children that did not grow up together, we were separated from our mother as children and then we’re united in our teens. 5 of us are now all in our 70’s and we get together a lot. The love we all share even tho we didn’t grow up together is amazing. I just thought it should be told. Your books are amazing and inspiring in so many ways. Thanks
Thank you for your encouragement. I didn’t think this way, I will try to make my life more fun and meaningful. Every time, I read your article, I got inspiration, thank you so much!
Danielle did comment on the tragedy in Orlando – check her Twitter page. Please allow her the time to gather her thoughts on Orlando and elaborate on it in her blog and Facebook page.
My dream is to move to Europe, not sure where yet I am still researching and teach English to children for a while. I can’t wait to make this happen. Love always and thanks for your blog posts!
Hello Danielle – wishing you health and continued happiness.
I’ve been having fun advertising for art that I did in high school. I’ve seen some things I can’t believe I did. How our creative minds change over time!
I just restored the most unique and amazing typewriter from 1910
It looks like something out of a Jules Vern novel. It was in rough condition when I found it at the local flea market, but that was mostly superficial. It felt good to restore it to the unique work of art that it is. When I find your email address I will forward a couple of photos of it.
Bee well – J