I’m sorry I was a no show last week, I was busy writing, and am very happy with what I’ve been working on, and I hope you will be too. Writing is often where I take refuge from real life, and my own problems, it’s a world where I am comfortable, feel at ease, know how to solve the problems in the story, and sometimes when the writing soars, it is pure joy. After doing it for a long time, I still thoroughly enjoy what I do, even though it’s hard work and challenging at times, and even exhausting when I work 20 hour stretches on my old typewriter. Sometimes it’s almost like flying, as you rise above the clouds, and see things more clearly, about life, and intricate situations. And I always fall in love with the characters in the book, and they become real to me, just as they do to you. It’s probably because they do seem real to me that you feel that way too when you read the books. The characters I write about are always fictional, because it would be too limiting to base them on real people. So I’ve been having a great time writing, and I hope you like the book when you read it. (I never tell the story or the title beforehand. It’s more fun to keep it a surprise!! But I think you will love this one, as I do!!)
Other than that (the fun I had writing), I think it’s official, it was a tough week. There are worse things than having a bad week, but enough challenging things happened to finally make me say, okay…..this week was pretty damn hard. Some unexpected disappointments, a couple of worries, a few really unpleasant moments, a betrayal by people I trusted, which is always a heart breaking experience to some degree. Nothing was easy, everything was hard. When I was a kid, I had cousins in Spain, and when I visited them, at times they thought it was fun to open the window at night, in the country, bats would fly in, and they would bat them back out as they flew in, with their tennis rackets. A truly disgusting sport I never participated in with them. But this week was rather like that, the bats were flying in the window faster than I could bat them out. (And frankly, bats terrify me!! Yuk!!). I think the bats won this week, but you start all over again, and next week will undoubtedly be better. And along with the bad stuff, there are always unexpected touching moments. Nothing terrible happened this week, fortunately. It was just a lot of the kind of stuff that wears you down, and discourages you for a minute. It was a discouraging week. You have them too, I know (which is why the books resonate for you). And problems are like grapes, they always seem to come in bunches. On the up side this week was my writing, on the down side was real life.
To top it off, last Friday was my late son Nick’s birthday, May 1st. May Day is a happy day, lily of the valley (my favorite flower) is the symbol of the day, and his birthday was always a happy event. (He loved a party, and LOVED his birthday!!) The day is bittersweet now, because his absence is so sorely felt and we miss him so much. It’s a day filled with memories, and no matter how hard one tries to be philosophical about it, and grateful for the good times, the reality is that he’s gone, and that will always hurt, especially on special days, like his birthday. He was basically a happy person, with a wild sense of humor, and a huge heart, and a huge talent (for writing and music). He was a very bright light in our world, a brief comet across our skies, too brief, but that’s how comets are. They shoot through the sky, and too quickly they are gone. But he left us with powerful memories, and a million treasured moments, of happy times with him. It’s hard to be sad for long when you think about him (He had an enormous smile, laughed a lot, and made us laugh outrageously at times). But it was a hard day at the end of a hard week. As I always do, I had dinner with a few close friends that night, and we had a warm, cozy evening, and after spending time with friends, I felt better by the end of it. And my other children and I spoke many times during the day, and talked about Nick.
And Life always has a way of giving us unexpected gifts. Out of the blue, a friend of mine sent me some of the lyrics of one of Nick’s songs that he wrote, which said just what I needed to hear, in Nick’s own words:
“..everyone sees hardship
and everyone feels pain
and if anyone knows
you and me
that sun will shine through rain..
..and my shoulder is always
if you ever need to cry,
everything will turn out fine
because I will
always love you
until the day I die. ”
– Nick Traina
So, it’s a new week, and it IS going to be a good one, for all of us. We start fresh again, in hope and faith. NO BATS PLEASE!! I refuse to play that game again. Take good care, and may it be an easy happy week for you, filled with good news and joy!! Mother’s Day is at the end of this week. I hope it’s a good one!!! May it all be good this week!!